reality will not be televised

Originally published Oct 20, 2009.



The year is 2020 and we are in the back office of a taco bell(because everyone knows taco bell won the fast food wars).
Hiring Manger: "So we got your application here, Mr. Heene...falcon...that name sounds familiar."
falcon heene: "well I called a number of times trying to arrange an interview."
H.mgr: "Falcon...hey, aren't you the balloon boy?"
Falcon: "well i'm 19 now-"
mgr: "ha! balloon man i'm sorry. Hey frank! get in here I gotta show you something!"
Frank: "hey whats up?"
mgr: "guess who this guy is."
frank: "I don't know"
mgr: "balloon boy, we got fuckin balloon boy in our store!"
frank: "wow! Hey I saw that thing on teevee! Are you really him?"
falcon: "...yes..."
mgr: "frank you gotta get my picture with the balloon boy, my wife is never going to believe this."
(pose and picture)
falcon: "So I really want this job, its hard to get hired because of my name. How does it look?"
mgr: "oh, yes, oh, i mean..well no. I mean I can't hire you I'm sorry, bill at corporate would never let me hear the end of it if I hired the balloon boy. But good luck out there, seriously. I'm sure you'll do fine, after all you're famous!"